Jonathan Gregory Brandis
JB.org

Fan Writing


Stories, page 4


When I heard about Jonathan's life ending, I was shocked to the core. When I was 13-15 I dreamed of going to Florida (where he lived the last time I had these fantasies) and swimming with the dolphins with him. Than, we'd fall madly in love and get married... hehe. The things you think about at 13. It's fun remembering these good memories, though. Like the wall I had dedicated specifically to him. I even had a 3 foot poster on my ceiling so that I'd always wake up to his gorgeous face..... God, did I have it bad. No love that I've felt for any guy in the recent years COMPARED to the crush I had on that boy LOL

I remember, one night, me and 2 of my girlfriends had a sleep over at one of her places and we had a Jonathan Brandis marathon. We'd rented It, The Stepfather 2, I THINK Neverending Story 2, and Sidekicks. While watching Sidekicks, there was a part where he was in western uniform. He had a cowboy hat. He sorta clicks his tongue and dips his hat. My friends and I screamed, rewound it, watched it, screamed, rewound it... over and over. And from then on I've had a fetish about cowboy hats hehehe.

For the little I really knew him... he'll always be a part of my memories. A part of my childhood. The good part.

Contributed by smem



I'm 19, a freshman at Georgia Tech, and my SeaQuestDSV poster of Jonathan Brandis is still on the wall of my room. Every now and then I check a website to see if dvd sets of any of my favorite tv shows has come out. Tonight, almost 4 months afterwards I find out about Jonathan Brandis. After checking to see if SeaQuest was going to be blessed with a dvd collection, I checked to find out if Jonathan Brandis had done any new movies. I scrolled down to the posting boards to see the words "oscar memorium?" which I quickly clicked on. As soon as I started reading I realized what I was reading in shock. It hurts to know that one of my favorite actors is no longer with us, that he wasn't respected at the Oscars, and that his wonderful talent was not respected more. He will forever be cherished in my heart. Thank you for continuing a site to celebrate his life and work.

Contributed by Kristin Stearns



I can't even remember when I started being a fan of Jonathan Brandis... Yesterday, while searching the Net for some news on his career, I was schocked to hear about the sad truth. I still can't believe it's actually happened. I'm also very angry and disappointed that the French media didn't mention anything.

Jon will always be in my heart... He was just a few months older than me... What a loss...

I just hope he did it for a good reason and that he's better now, with angel wings, watching us from Heaven...

Your site is wonderful... Thanks.

Contributed by Isabelle
Strasbourg, France



Dear Jon Happy Birthday, I hope your pain has gone away. And I know what you were going through i ahd the same experiences as you did. Unfortunately, you never reached 28 down here, we were to late. Miss you lots Happy birthday Jon. xoxo

Love Ren Russo



I can't believe I am taking time off my work to write this, but I feel I owe it to the memories Jon's fame contributed to my teen years. It was nine years ago, I was 14 and a geek. At that age, I was still akward, moody, at that funny stage where adjusting to being a grown-up was hard, but I found solace in my fanatic admiration towards this guy. I remember saving my allowance just to get those BOP magazines and braving typhoons just to get to the grocery or bookstore. I remember how my parents would roll their eyes everytime I squealed at every SQ episode. I will never forget how my bestfriend and I made up secret codes when we talk for hours on the phone about him. We even made a promise that one day, we will go to the US, apply at a Mcdo joint near Hollywood and meet Jon Brandis. It was a crazy idea, but now, even a tiny chance of that becoming true, is gone. Even if we'd never do it for real, I somehow thought that one day I may just take my friend for that silly plan and just meet Jon.

I cried (at this age!) when I found out he died. My first reaction was "Why?". If only he knew that a lot still love him and that he shaped millions of girls' lives, he would've thought twice about taking his life. He was almost the perfect guy and somehow I unconsciously try to find a "Jonathan Brandis" in all the guys I date. It was such a waste. He inspired me to do a lot of things, to succeed, to be who I am right now. He was an important part of my growing up years. He actually made me strive for perfection, to explore my capabilities. He was so talented, I admired and envied him at the same time.

Months have passed since his death but I am still in disbelief. His death reminded me of change and makes me hope that there really is a better place after death. Truly I will never accept that he is just gone. His spirit lives on, he lives in people like me whose lives and views have been inspired by him.

Contributed by Claire Lee -- Manila, Philippines



I will always remember where I was and what I was doing when I found out that Jonathan had died.I was sitting in the college parking lot, reading Soap Opera Digest. I read a small article that said Jon had hung himself in November. I was so shocked. Of course, not too many people recall him. I called up my sister, who loved him too. We both cried a little bit. I remember Sundays and looking forward too seeing him on seaQuest.My parents thought I was way too obsessed with him. My room was covered in JB pics. I wrote stories about him, and even dreamed about him. He was brilliant annd taken from us way too soon.

Contributed by JLynch



I’m sitting here in front of my computer, struggling to find the right words to describe everything that is going through my heart right now. The first time I had the pleasure of seeing Jonathan was in the film “Ladybugs.” I was probably only ten at the time.

I remember sitting around the television with my family, watching the Sunday Night movie. While my sister was cuddled up close to my parents, I sat cross-legged on the floor, my nose almost touching the T.V screen. Jonathan’s beauty and poise captivated me. I was attracted to his cute facial expressions, and the way that his voice would crack every once in a while. I often had Movie Star crushes, even at the ripe young age of ten years old. However, Jonathan Brandis, the boy with the bright smile, stunning blue eyes, and handsome hair was more then just a crush to me. He was the first boy to actually take my breath away. He was the first boy that (in my eyes) didn’t have cooties. He was the first boy to make my heart beat faster and slower at the same time.

However, I put most of Jonathan Brandis’ fans to shame, when I say that I never went out and bought magazines in order to see his flawless face. I never looked him up online, or went out of my way to find his contact information. The truth is, I forgot about him, and went on with my life.

Now, four years later, and two years after Jonathan’s death, I have just found out about his passing. Most of you are probably thinking, “It’s about time!” But sometimes, I wish that I had never found out. That I could still live in my fantasy world where him and I lived happily ever after, together. I probably wouldn’t have even found out that he was dead if I hadn’t been so bored lately. I was searching through a collection of tapes when I found the movie, Ladybugs. It brought back the feelings that I had once harbored for Jonathan.

I looked him up online, excited to see all that he has been up to lately, and was shocked to see him reported dead. My heart dropped to my toes, and tears fell from my eyes. If only I had written him millions of letters, told him how much I loved him, how I got lost in his eyes, how my heart beat just for him. But I know it probably wouldn’t have made a difference. Jonathan was out of his fan’s reach, out of everyone’s reach. Sometimes, I wish I could go back in time, and save him, but even that, is impossible.

I often have feelings of anger towards him, followed by feelings of guilt. Jonathan wasn’t supposed to live a short-lived life. He had so much to live for, so much going for him… he had his fans, his family, and his friends. However, somewhere within him, he was utterly unhappy. It disappoints me that he took his own life. I used to think suicide as almost greedy and selfish. No one should use killing as an easy way out of this world. But Jonathan’s death has made me realize, people can be so truly unhappy with themselves, and the world around them, that they can’t help but put themselves out of their own misery.

As I scan through this site, and look at all the wonderful work that everyone has put into it. I feel warmth fill my heart… with the satisfaction that Jonathan will never be forgotten. He was like the moon, amongst the stars, a rose amid a field of daisies, the kind of person that the world needs more of. To Jonathan’s family, your loss has been tremendous, and I don’t know much when it comes to death, but sometimes, the best thing to do when someone dies, is just keep on loving him. He may be gone... but he’ll never be forgotten. Somewhere, inside all of the Jonathan Brandis fans, we hold a memory of him, a picture, you could call it. Where he’s still young, his hair long and gorgeous, his eyes blue and piercing, and he’s happy, and he’s healthy… and most of all he’s living. Jonathan lives within each of us, who care for him, and like a candle, we won’t let his flame burn out.

Contributed by Emily, 14


I want to let you know that I had the pleasure of knowing Jonathan when he worked on the set of Ride with the Devil. When I heard about what had happened I could not believe what I heard. In the short time I knew him his was a very nice and considerate man. We talked awhile and met at a place for karoake. At first I had no clue who he was, the only thing I knew was that he was regular person with a great personality. I just wish that I had the chance to talk with him again and to be his friend like he was to me. If he was here today I would tell him thankyou Jonathan for giving me hope.

Contributed by Angela


I just wanted to say that I was very sad when I heard about Jon. I've suffered from depression for years and I can relate to him in that aspect. I have a love that I didn't even realize existed until I heard the horrible news. I've loved him enough to name my child after 2 of his characters, Lucas and Preston(from Her Last Chance) and I remembered that I used to write him fan letters just hoping he would pick mine and call me. Unfortunately, he never did, and I will never know why he ultimately decided that life wasn't worth living. I will always have a place for him in my heart, and I think anyone that was lucky enough to know him was definitely a very lucky person.

I miss Jonathan and I truly believe that he was one of those special people that only comes along once in a long time and he was taken away too quickly.

With love, a Jonathan fan


Even though it's been over a year since his death, I still find it hard to believe that Jonathan is gone.

I remember exactly how I found out about his death. I was browsing on Joey McIntyre's message board (former New Kid on the Block-er) when I noticed a girl had posted a topic that Jonathan Brandis had died. I had found out about it a few weeks after it happend, like most people. I was in a state of shock. He seemed to be such a happy person, from what I could tell. Of couse I immediately scanned the internet to find out more info, which was scarce at the time. No one was sure if it was actually suicide or just an accident, which I guess we will never really know the answer to. I called my cousin Sarah shortly after to let her know. She actually couldn't hardly remember who he was, but I told her to tell my other cousin Brandy, who was crazy over him back in the day. I, myself, really wasn't a huge fan of his, but I thought he was cute & I liked some of his movies. I did have some admiration for him. I kept some posters of him & I even bought the huge purple background poster of him that Bop was selling. I had kept most of those magazines for over 10 years. Right after I found out about his death, I thought about all of those magazines I had not gotten around to throwing away yet, & thank goodness I'm a pack rat because I was able to pull out all of those posters & articles & had on him & put them in a notebook. I guess there was a reason I had hung on to those magazines anyway.

My condolences go to his family, friends, & fans. He was a talented & gifted human being. If he had only realized how many people loved him & depended on the Lord more maybe things would have turned out differently.

God Bless, Susan Whitener


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In memoriam, Jonathan Gregory Brandis 1976-2003
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